winter blues
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Even though this has been a milder winter than usual, the sun is still going down before I get home at night, and it amazes me how much its absence affects my mood.
The sun lurks past coldly,
an estranged friend
sneaking by
on the
opposite sidewalk
avoiding eye contact
behind a turned-up collar of
silhouetted buildings.
He hangs in other hemispheres these days.
I must be
last season's affair,
if he thinks of me at all.
The day opens
her doors only briefly,
pulling in her awning
as schools let out,
flipping her sign to "closed"
as the shadows grow long on the sidewalk,
slipping onto the bus before rush hour.
I pass her grated storefront
on my way to and from work,
wondering if she's gone out of business.
The papers pile on my desk,
layers moldering together,
settling
into impenetrable strata,
insurmountable mounds.
I should have raked
them into manageable heaps
and burned them back when they first fell there.
I cannot begin to make sense of them.
They are past their deadlines
waiting as mulch for the crocuses.
4 Comments:
Wow, beautifully written. I like your imagery, Jay. And I have experienced this.
I was diagnosed with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) several years ago and the knowledge and treatment improved my life.
Have you looked into the possibility?
Tom
Thanks Tom!
You know, some years I've considered getting tested for SAD, though most years it simply amounts to a few weeks of distractions and procrastinating. I know others suffer far worse and debilitating complications than what I experience. But most years, by the time the sun comes back, even as early as March, I'm not as bad off and I lose the incentive to get tested.
I actually wrote this poem last winter when I was in way more of a funk and the weather was colder for a longer stretch of time than this year. The return of cold weather this week and being tired and missing being in my new apartment on week days reminded me of this poem, so I dusted it off for the blog.
I just heard about light therapy working wonders for SAD... anyone suffering from the symptoms might want to look into it. It's simple, painless, and works pretty quickly. (If the reports are accurate)
Very good! I liked it quite a bit.
We are starting to get lighter down South here at night and I no longer arrive home in the dark. So much better for the state of mind.
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